Tuesday, March 12, 2019

I Know Its A Sin But Is It That Bad? : The Destruction of Marriage


I Know Its A Sin But Is It That Bad?:
The Destruction of Marriage

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The Bible

God’s Ideal Genesis 2:21-25


 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;  And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.  And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.  Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.  And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

1 Timothy 3:1-2, 4-5
 This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work.  A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach; 

One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity;  (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?)

1 Timothy 3:11-12
 Even so must their wives be grave, not slanderers, sober, faithful in all things.  Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well.
If these verses show us God’s ideal, His plan for the family He will bless, we can draw the following conclusions.

1. The family was to be one husband and one wife.
2. In God’s eyes the husband and wife were equally important to the family.
3. There was never a hint in God’s ideal plan for more than one spouse.
4. The husband was responsible to God for the welfare and care of the family.
God’s Commandment

Exodus 20:12
 Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

Deuteronomy 5:16
 Honour thy father and thy mother, as the LORD thy God hath commanded thee; that thy days may be prolonged, and that it may go well with thee, in the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.
The family was included in the 10 commandments. Here we are commanded that the father and mother were to be treated with honor, showing that God held the family in high regard as something sacred and valuable, essential to the nation of Israel’s long life and keeping their land.

God’s Blessing

Psalms 127:3-5 Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

Psalm 128:3
 Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table.
God views the family, the wife and the children as his blessing. Anything that would destroy or hinder the family, or the members of the family would be against God’s blessings.

Jesus Teaching

Matthew 19:3-9
 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?  And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,  And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?  Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.  They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away?  He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.  And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.

Summary:

God’s ideal for the family, presented in these few verses but seen throughout scripture, is one man, one woman and children under the protection and instruction of the father and mother. Anything that would go against this ideal would be outside of God’s will and his blessing.

The Bad


The family is under direct Satanic attack in today’s society. Should the family fall,  our nation, society, and churches will also fall. Much of our society’s new openness to homosexuality, same sex marriage, lack of church attendance, denial of gender, etc are due to the failure of the family.

Cohabitation


According to the latest Census report, the number of cohabiting couples escalated from 6.7 million in 2009 to 7.5 million just one year later in 2010.  Living together has become today’s “normative experience,” with nearly 50 percent of young adults aged twenty to forty cohabiting. Moreover, the percentage of women in their late 30s who said that they had cohabited at least once reached 48 percent in 1995.  While increasingly common among college students and young professionals — even Prince William and Kate Middleton, who have just announced their engagement, have been living together in Wales — cohabitation is significantly more prevalent among those who are less well-educated and poor.

The truth is that only a fraction — barely 10 percent — of cohabiting couples are able to move on to build a strong, happy marriage that lasts a lifetime.  More typically, cohabitation is preparation for divorce, rather than training for marriage.  The two household arrangements (cohabitation and marriage) are decidedly different, and that is why the vast majority of couples who live together before getting married end up divorced; the divorce rates of women who cohabit are nearly 80 percent higher than the rates of those who do not.  Consequently, the majority of cohabiting relationships do not end in marriage, as was previously the case.  During the 1970s, about 60 percent of cohabiting couples married each other within three years, but this proportion has since declined to less than 40 percent.

According to the National Crime Victimization Survey, of all violent crimes against women by their intimate partners between 1979 and 1987, about 65 percent were committed by either a boyfriend or ex-husband, while only 9 percent were committed by husbands.

Another study, published in the Journal of Family Violence, explains the following regarding the association between batterer and victim, “The most frequently cited relationship was cohabitation, with close to one-half (48 percent) of the couples living together.”

The Family Violence Research Program at the University of New Hampshire conducted a study of more than two thousand adults concerning this subject. It was concluded that the overall rates of violence for cohabiting couples was twice as high and the overall rate for “severe” violence was nearly five times as high for cohabiting couples when compared with married couples.

According to the National Crime Victimization Survey, of all violent crimes against women by their intimate partners between 1979 and 1987, about 65 percent were committed by either a boyfriend or ex-husband, while only 9 percent were committed by husbands.

Another study, published in the Journal of Family Violence, explains the following regarding the association between batterer and victim, “The most frequently cited relationship was cohabitation, with close to one-half (48 percent) of the couples living together.”

The Family Violence Research Program at the University of New Hampshire conducted a study of more than two thousand adults concerning this subject. It was concluded that the overall rates of violence for cohabiting couples was twice as high and the overall rate for “severe” violence was nearly five times as high for cohabiting couples when compared with married couples.

Divorce


Recently, a report by the Institute for American Values, a private, nonpartisan family think tank, challenged the divorce presupposition.

"In popular discussion and in scholarly literature, the assumption has always been that if a marriage is unhappy, if you get a divorce, it is likely you will be happier than if you stayed married," said David Blankenhorn of the Institute. "This is the first time this has been tested empirically, and [the tests show that] there is no evidence to support this assumption."

The research shows that unhappily married adults who had divorced were no happier than those who had stayed married.

"Divorce leads to many ills including poverty, depression, poor health and a greater likelihood of suicide," said Bridget Maher, a policy analyst on marriage and family at the Family Research Council. "Divorced men have higher rates of mental illness and death due to accidents and suicide than married men. Also, divorced fathers who do not live with their children are more likely to engage in behaviors that compromise their health. A study of children's home environments found that divorced mothers are less able to provide the same level of emotional support to their children than married mothers."

One landmark study revealed that 90 percent of children from divorced homes suffered from an acute sense of shock when the separation occurred, including profound grieving and irrational fears.183 Fifty percent reported feeling rejected and abandoned,184 and indeed, half of the fathers never came to see their children three years after the divorce.185 One-third of the boys and girls feared abandonment by the remaining parent, and 66 percent experienced yearning for the absent parent with an intensity that researchers described as overwhelming.186 Most significant, 37 percent of the children were even more unhappy and dissatisfied five years after the divorce than they had been at 18 months.187 In other words, time did not heal their wounds.

Same Sex Marriage


Same sex marriage is the straw that breaks the camel’s back when it comes to the family.
If it is your right to marry whomever you want then how can you prohibit polygamy, pedophilia, child marriages or marrying your dog or cat? Answer you can’t.
Same sex marriage is not a marriage at all. To homosexuals it is a tax issue but it does not change their promiscuous lifestyle.

Example - Jonathan Yarbrough (a bisexual) and Cody Rogahn (a homosexual) were the first same-sex couple in Provincetown, MA to receive a marriage application. They explained to the normal that “…it’s possible to love more than one person and have more than one partner… In our case… we have an open marriage…”

No human society—not one—has ever tolerated “marriage” between members of the same sex as a norm for family life. And that is what is at stake here, making “marriage” between two men or two women as normal as between one man and one woman. It is saying that neither arrangement is any better than the other. As Dr. Dobson writes, only until the last few “milliseconds” of history and experience (i.e. Canada and some European nations) have we arrogantly believed we can improve upon this ancient and universal institution.

Anthropologists tell us that every human society is established by males and females joining in permanent unions to build a life together and bear and raise their children. The differences we see in family from culture to culture are primarily variations on this model: how long the male and female stay together, how many spouses either can have and how the labor is divided. Some cultures make greater use of extended family than others. Family diversity is largely confined to these differences. But there has never been a culture or society that made homosexual marriage part of its family model.

 A British medical journal reports male homosexual relationships last, on average, 1.5 years, and gay men have an average of eight partners a year outside of their supposedly “committed” relationships.
 Research consistently shows that married adults do better in virtually every measure of well-being. Married people live longer, happier lives. They enjoy higher levels of physical and mental health, they recover from illness quicker, earn and save more money, are more reliable employees, suffer less stress, and are less likely to become victims of any kind of violence. They find the job of parenting more successful and enjoyable and they have more satisfying and fulfilling sex lives. These benefits are largely equal for men and women.

Compared with children in any other situation, children with married parents need to visit doctors less often for physical or emotional problems, and they do better in all measures of intellectual and academic development. They are more sympathetic toward others and much less likely to be in trouble at school, at home or with the police. They are much less likely to use drugs and be involved in violent behavior or premarital sexual activity and childbearing. It is uncommon for kids who live with married parents to live in poverty or be victims of physical or sexual abuse.3 Research is clear: marriage makes a substantial, positive difference in people’s lives.

 Research indicates that children raised by homosexuals experiment with sexually aberrant behaviors at a higher rate than children raised by heterosexuals and do so at earlier ages. Heartbreakingly, according to a 1996 study by an Austrian sociologist, children raised by homosexual parents did worse in nine of 13 academic and social categories compared to children raised by heterosexual married couples.

A 2001 article in American Sociological Review reported that children raised by lesbians are more likely to engage in homosexual behavior and are “more sexually adventurous.”

Just this fall, Kansas State University family studies professor Walter Schumm released a “detailed analysis” which reveals that, according to AOL News, “gay parents are more likely to raise gay children than straight parents.”

In fact, he concludes that when the analysis is restricted to children in their 20s, a staggering 58 percent of the children of lesbians self-identify as gay, and 33% of the children of gay men self-identify as gay. All this while the overall population of gays and lesbians represents just two to three percent of the population.


Conclusion


In the article The Public Purpose of Marriage… by Glenn T. Stanton, he states,

“Research consistently shows that married adults do better in virtually every measure of well-being. Married people live longer, happier lives. They enjoy higher levels of physical and mental health, they recover from illness quicker, earn and save more money, are more reliable employees, suffer less stress, and are less likely to become victims of any kind of violence. They find the job of parenting more successful and enjoyable and they have more satisfying and fulfilling sex lives. These benefits are largely equal for men and women.

Compared with children in any other situation, children with married parents need to visit doctors less often for physical or emotional problems, and they do better in all measures of intellectual and academic development. They are more sympathetic toward others and much less likely to be in trouble at school, at home or with the police. They are much less likely to use drugs and be involved in violent behavior or premarital sexual activity and childbearing. It is uncommon for kids who live with married parents to live in poverty or be victims of physical or sexual abuse

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